Artist Stan Piotroski: A Life that Feels Right

Speaker 1 00:00:01 Ever since you can remember, you felt something in your chest telling you to move, to love, to speak, to try day after day. You pretend you don't hear calling. Maybe you just, I miss it is silliness or worse, but it's there ready for you. And it's a little wait for you. As long as you mean. My name is Johnny G and I invite you to join me on a journey of awakening. As we dare to embrace our light. This is refractive. Speaker 2 00:00:32 <inaudible> Speaker 1 00:00:40 Good afternoon, everybody. This is Johnny G with refractive. If you're familiar with refractive and its values, you know that right? Speaker 3 00:00:48 One of my guiding principles and you hear it a lot in my content is aim your light. I mentioned this phrase fairly often with clients as well, because it references the immeasurable power of creation that I believe lies within each person. And that creative power is available for use. Whenever we agree to live by our gut or live by our intuition. In fact, the reason I chose the name refractive for my organization for my practice is the quality of each person being like a prism to receive in energy and then transform bend an aim that energy, as we put it back out to the world, I have a treat for you today. I'll be introducing you to Stan PI Troskey. He is an individual I've met some years ago here in DC. Stan has molded a life of love and joy for himself by listening to that inner sense of knowing and by stepping in faith and courage that his inner guidance was worth following he's someone who indeed does aim his light. Speaker 3 00:02:08 And he's someone that I deeply respect from my perspective. Stan is actively responsible for his place in the world, and he is responsible for the energy he puts out to others. This is a big reason why I wanted to introduce him too. The refractive world here over stand's long professional life. He has risen entitled in responsibility, adding prestige through a solid handful of sectors. He was an officer in the armed forces. He was a federal employee in the executive branch. He was a psychotherapist with a private practice, and that's just to name a few phases of his career. But beneath this life story, a both officer and gentlemen, Stan says that he always knew he would be a full time artist. And throughout his life, he carved out time space, energy resources for that passion. So unlike many of us, and I really speak for myself who had been drawn to a creative field, but have settled in the past for a more realistic or stable or classic type of career. Speaker 3 00:03:20 Stan told me that his earlier roles were not chosen at the expense of his love of art. Rather, they were deliberately selected as a part of his life path and they led him step by step into the life he lives today, where he can in fact, devote his time and energy to art. Today's Stan operates his own art studio and his own gallery. And just like so many times before he is exactly where he feels he should be now his life as an artist. Isn't the only example of Stan's willingness to say yes to the universe. He also said yes to love and not long ago, Stan followed his gut yet again and married his husband and having had the privilege to meet stand's husband. I can assure you, they are as lovely and inspiring a couple as I've ever met. So with that said, let's get to it. Hi Stan. Good afternoon. How are you doing today? Speaker 4 00:04:27 Oh, good afternoon, John. And thank you for those kind and generous words. Um, I'm having a lovely day and I was looking forward to speaking on this podcast and relating my experience as to how my life dreams have developed. So I'm happy to be here today. Speaker 3 00:04:49 Thank you so much. I am delighted to have view and you know, I think that one of the elements that brings people to refractive is the feeling that they've received guidance and intuition throughout their life, that they're supposed to follow path a, but they've second guess themselves. And they've chosen the more safe society endorsed path, um, thereby leaving themselves, feeling lukewarm and unsatisfied by where they end up. Uh, and I think that this moment, which is a crazy moment in the history of our world is a really good time for people to pivot and to listen to their heart and do what feels right to them. And because I have seen you from the outside follow that type of path, I really feel that there's some value for you and our listeners. So thank you for the sake of the listeners who may be hearing this in future months, although Stan and I both live in DC, we're connected today by video because of the COVID quarantine. Speaker 3 00:05:59 So listeners please, excuse us. If the audio quality may be a little bit inconsistent compared to what we normally do. So with that, we're going to get, we're going to get started with talking about sand here. So Stan, you and I have been in each other's orbits for about five years now. And when I first started to do a podcast at the beginning of this year, I knew immediately that I wanted you to be on it. And there are two reasons for that. The first reason is that you have a very calming presence, um, and it feels good to be in a room with you that calming presence that you have spreads. And it's a special quality that in my experience can take a while to develop. So am I off base with this? Do you understand what I'm talking about, Speaker 4 00:06:50 Johnny? I, I do understand what you're referring to and oftentimes there's moments in my life where the calm, the settles in, and there also other times when there's an next excitement. And then in that pension of the future of the bow, for the most part, I believe that I'm, I'm settled within myself. And that takes a lot of work, a lot of opportunity, Trinity, uh, to develop that sense of security within one's lines. And at this point in time, it's something that actually coming naturally. So Johnny, your intuition is working very well. Speaker 3 00:07:43 Can you send that? It takes a little bit of work, at least it had in the past for you. What did that, how did that look? Speaker 4 00:07:52 Well, you know, I think that a lot of it is looking at oneself and a variety of factors. Certainly therapy has been a part of that starting in New York city and following through and in different venues where you get to explore the inner self. Uh, I'm a strong believer in meditation. I believe that can be very helpful. It quiets the mind and allows you to get in touch with that part of yourself that, you know, has always been there. Uh, you know, the other dimension of our lives. And I've had great opportunity in my life too. Get in touch with that dimension of hunting quite a bit, a bit of traveling all over the world, some of a professionally oftentimes, uh, it has been for pleasure, but it's been in unique situations where, uh, you get in touch with something much greater than yourself and it allows you to be open in a way that, um, you may not be if you don't have that same opportunity to be there. So that's, that's certainly part of it. Part of my experience, Speaker 3 00:09:25 What is your preferred methodology for meditation today? Speaker 4 00:09:31 Breathing, paying attention to your breathing. I'm following, you know, certain people who are master have mastered the art of meditation and who are good teachers sitting quietly, allowing your mind to go wherever it's going to go. Okay. Speaker 3 00:09:56 Did you use YouTube or apps to find these individuals that you follow? Speaker 4 00:10:03 I do Speaker 3 00:10:04 Any that you'd like to recommend off the top of your head. I don't know if you might know their names. Speaker 4 00:10:09 Well, certainly I would recommend Jonathan Foust, who is a local individual and he is part of the insight community here in the DC Metro area. Yeah. Uh, and Jonathan, you know, is quite experienced. And then I follow apps Inside timer, Nicholas. It is a discipline. And when I first started, I really need, it had to have that discipline in my life too, to quiet the mind. Speaker 3 00:10:46 I also started my experience with meditation through apps, because as you know, at first, there's just no way to sit there silently for 10 minutes and enjoy it. It's a little bit, it's a little bit of craziness going on in the mind. And so by using those brief guided meditations for five minutes, eight minutes at a time, eventually I got to the point where I could enjoy just following my breath and doing it silently. But yeah, I love those apps. I really think that they opened door. You know, The second reason that I wanted to have you on the refractive podcast, Dan, is that you put out, that's a significant love energy. Sometimes it looks like kindness. Sometimes it looks like caring, but as I've seen you interact with different people, there is really just a lovely flow of love that comes out of you. And what is your awareness of that? Is it something that you have cultivated or is it just an automatic natural part of you? Speaker 4 00:11:55 No, I believe it's a part of me. My parents are very loving and accepting people who instilled in us Speaker 4 00:12:05 The value of being open to a loving, kindness and generosity in our lives. It's developed certainly over the years. And as I age, it really began to understand what's important in your life and people are important. I'm also valuing those attributes and people where love slows freely. You know, the, there is very few pretense of a gloves in life, either it's there or it's not there. But I also understand when people can't show love that there's something going on and they just may need some help to do that. I've had plenty of help to have an internal freedom where I can just express lovingly how I experienced someone. I always feel that there's something good and everyone. Speaker 3 00:13:14 Alright, thank you for that. From my perspective, Stan, you seem to have learned to tune your life compass to something that seems very healthy and nourishing. Is that correct? Do I have that assumption correctly? Speaker 4 00:13:30 I believe so. Speaker 3 00:13:32 What can you say about that? Speaker 4 00:13:34 Well, it comes from a variety of sources, certainly, you know, the work that we do on ourselves and the enlightenment that we experienced through the process, the variety of the processes that are open to us, you know, has led to discovery discovery of who we are and where we want to go and, uh, what we want with our lives. But I think the basis of all of that is a certain level of trust trust in one's beliefs, trust in it, venture that you want to be on and the courage to take those halves. I think we've all done that you've done that. I've done that. And it's a knowing that we develop in our lives and trusting that no. And if there's doubt, then we check it out with other people. No, uh, no man or woman is an Island. Speaker 3 00:14:31 <inaudible> how have you been able to develop and grow that trust Speaker 4 00:14:38 Time and experience well has helped me to develop that trust. Speaker 3 00:14:51 How so? Speaker 4 00:14:54 Well, I, I think, you know, from age Johnny, it is continuing to experiment with your life and you try many things, you venture out whatever to wherever and whatever you know is leading you in that path. And you build on the success of openness and willingness. That's been minds. And again, you know, having the resolve to follow what you know is right. I really believe that each one of us has a sense of who we are and where we want to go. And sometimes it just takes a while to get there. Speaker 3 00:15:44 Yeah, That's lovely. All right. That resonates with me Taking that idea of your life compass, relating it to the idea of higher self inner wisdom, gut and intuition. How does your intuition show up for you in what form does your intuition show up? Speaker 4 00:16:07 That's a good question. I think it happens in all forms of life. What's worked for you in the past. Yeah. Builds on our intuition. Uh, and then there is a good experience where you just know what's right. Yeah. Have clear away some of the wreckage of the past and, and understand yourself in a more detailed fashion you could begin to, to trust yourself so that when you have an inspiration, you, first of all, value that inspiration from where it's coming and then you proceed to proceed with the willingness to try things out. That's what I've done in my life. And then feedback, feedback from others. I think, I believe and think is an important part of the process of intuition. Then I think there is an innate part of intuition. You just know, you know, you just know the next right thing to do. Speaker 3 00:17:20 You know? Um, with the beginning of the quarantine started, I, uh, I had this very strong idea that I needed to buy a dog and I swear stand like I would have, I did. I argued with people. I was like, no, like I'm telling you, this is, I had been guided to this. And uh, I spoke to a friend of mine and he said, Johnny, you literally don't have a life that permits a dog. Like it is selfish. And it is not looking at the big perspective of this. If you want a dog, you first need to make several changes to the way your life is structured. And I'm just going to say that and offer it to you. Another thing. And that shook me, you know, to me, it was a good example of how, in one moment I can believe that something is so right, but then I need to bounce it off people. It might not be right at that moment. Speaker 4 00:18:33 <inaudible> Speaker 3 00:18:34 I find that to be one of the most difficult aspects of discernment, not every idea that is presented to me by my intuition is most appropriate. In that moment. It might be something that needs to be tucked away and left to Germany for six months or a year before it's appropriate. Speaker 4 00:19:01 Timing is important. He may know something about yourself prior to me, you made that on you, something that a dream that you want to pursue, but oftentimes it's not the right time. That's helpful to speak to value of friends and mentor to discuss justice and opportunity that you're thinking about with them. And there are times when they say, go for it right now, why would you not go for it? And that might be because there's some apprehension, there's some self doubt. That's where the value of people in your life is so important that you can bounce ideas, all of them and get a perspective. We can develop so much perspective on our own, and that comes from experience and successful experience. But having the opportunity when you're stuck to talk to someone and say, I'm not quite sure about this, but I really think that this is an important path for me to take. What do you think? Speaker 3 00:20:23 Yeah. I'm telling you if not, I would be, I would, I would be having a dog with me on this road trip right now stand. So I, uh, I am grateful for the wisdom of, uh, of trusted friends. Yes, for sure. So, uh, since you just talked about timing as being so, so important, you've mentioned that you've always known that your career would move towards art. Um, I wonder why you did not jump into a career in art as a young adult, but instead built it gradually over time. Speaker 4 00:21:15 Well, I think my first response to that and I'll go into a little more detail is that they were competing life circumstances that had value and chose to follow one path over another. I knew as a child, that I was an artist, I was a talented child artist and knew that my talent was innate. I had paybacks from family, friends, and professionals. And as I, uh, developed into a teenager, I had opportunities to do that, to do art on a high school level. Then I entered college and my artistic training began there. And I started to show my work to sell my work at a very young age and won an award. So there was enough feedback and this, the stream of life, that's a, you are an artist. And as I went forward in my life and I received a degree in psychology and then a masters in social work and then a doctorate in social work, I was still painting. Speaker 4 00:22:47 I was still working. I aren't edited a book. So there was a consistency in my life that said, this is who you are, but that was also, or than that, I had a lot of training as a psychotherapist and valued all of that and understood that that was important for me as I went on in life, I knew that at some point I would become a full time artist. There was never any doubt in my mind that that's the direction I was going, but there were other things I wanted to do before that. And now I have the resources and my life as I retired from my professional life as a social worker and director sure that I could now devote to art. And for the past five years, actually, even that while I was still, uh, working, I was actively you're painting and doing shows and exhibits. So it's always been a part of my life. And this is, you know, not just, um, one train it's knowing, and this is something that I know Speaker 3 00:24:08 What I am Feeling from. You know, your answer to that question Speaker 3 00:24:16 Is a serenity around building a foundational life, uh, of establishing a nice firm base and, uh, refining it, uh, as you move up over time. And this is exactly what I was talking about a few minutes ago with the idea of a dog, right? If I want a dog, let me build a foundation first and let me be serene. And knowing that while today is not the day that I go to the pound today might be the day that I choose not to renew my lease, where I am. And instead look for something that fits better. I hear that from you in this process of building the life that you want over time. Speaker 4 00:25:07 Well, Johnny, I think it's core and I believe it's important for all of us to identify what we clearly know about ourselves and what well, we value in ourselves. I know that in relationships and I know that professionally, and I know that as far as well, my dream there's an aspirations are at this point in my life. And to accept that and to believe it and to follow through on it, you know, I have the good fortune that I'm able to do that. And I'm very grateful for that. Speaker 3 00:25:49 How does fear show up in your life today? Speaker 4 00:25:53 Fear has always been a part of my life and dealing with fear or anxiety. It's more about an anxiety. You can look at anxiety in a positive or a negative way. How does it help me to live my life comfortably a day at a time? And how does it interfere? Yeah. And each time that I think about that regarding what circumstances I've timed myself, I know that all things work out and that I'm not in control of all of this, but I'm here to serve a purpose and to be of service as long as I'm here on this planet and wherever I go from Speaker 3 00:26:44 There, who knows? Yes. When you talked about the positive, as well as, uh, the more challenging sides of anxiety, this is something that I have grown to accept as, as a truth for me in my life, there is nothing that is wrong, right? So if I were to lose a member of my family, if there were to be a hurricane that wiped out my home, that as distasteful and unpleasant, as it may be, this is the course I signed up on earth school. Like this is the course I signed up for. This is the healing in my being that I need in order to be more whole and to access more of my true essence as a child of the creator. Uh, but it's hard. It doesn't feel good all the time. Know, Stan, let me ask, what would you advise to people who have felt called to a creative vocation? Speaker 3 00:28:02 And let me just, let me just peel back the layer and say me I'm talking about me. Okay. Because when I was in high school, I wanted to move to New York, go to NYU, be an actor I imagined being on stage and just living that life. And it felt so beautiful to me. And I never gave any soil to that plant. Right? Like there was just no chance from the gate that I was ever going to seriously entertain even a partial element of that. We weren't even going to do communities. We weren't going to do anything with it because it just felt that eventually I would fail it. Wasn't going to work out. It would be a life of pain and difficulty. And then I would go and eventually have to take some office job anyway. And now I'd be years behind my peers in title and income, you know? And, uh, so I gave up that calling of applying my creative force. And I think I'm not alone in this. I feel like this is a common story. So what would you say to people who are currently in that situation? Speaker 4 00:29:18 I would say go to an acting class, sign up, do it that's simple. Huh? That's simple. Just do it. I attended a, uh, master oil painting class in Provence and it was, um, a landscape painting, class impressionism. And I like impressionism, but I'm an abstract expressionism. And I went to the South of France and it was an arduous, tough class. And after three days, I said, I'm not going to do this. And I called my son. I called him, my husband. I called other important people in my lives. And I said, you know what? This is really hard. And they all chuckled. And that, especially my sons, that, that even you can do hard things. Speaker 4 00:30:25 So I will tell you straight, okay. Yeah. What I once told him, which, which we both had a chuckle over, but it was that contact. Uh, and I was honest. It really was quite demanding. We would paint 12, 15 hours a day and it was out of my comfort zone. But the support that I got from my son and husband and others was that you can do it. And we were actually painting in the darn close to, uh, the, uh, barkeep decides a palace, which is quite lovely. And I said, well, I can't see the paint time even mixing, which is a wonderful metaphor. And I just painted something. I brought it back cause we'd had teak of all the artists by the, a masterclass leader. And it turned out to be some of my okay, best break through art. Wow. So, you know, uh, so my, my recommendation for those individuals who are saying, gee, I don't know where to start. Speaker 4 00:31:46 We'll just do it go. And you know, if it's, if it's photography sign up for photography calls, if it's acting sign up for an acting class, if it's marked sign up for an art class or go to a art store and get, um, a palette and some paints and a canvas, if that's what you want to do. Uh, at one of my most recent shows, there was a lovely, a moment ago, came in since she showed me her, her work. And she had just a beautiful touch of water colors, which I find to be extraordinary. And it's very abstract and I, the chain don't stop. And then another little eight year old girl in, and she goes, I'm an artist. And I said, I believe you and her pants were standing there beaming. Cause you knew they were supportive of her art. And she showed me some of the work that she was doing. Speaker 4 00:32:55 And it was, it was really quite talented. So, you know, just do it. This is where you stop questioning, but you already know, and you looked for the opportunity and you started at a point where going, Oh, I can do this. And if you don't think you can, then you have to ask us tough. Why not? If it's out of apprehension or fear or just indecision or sometimes it's it's I don't have the money and okay. You know, then you figure out another alternative that you can explore this, create a part of yourself. And, and don't listen to the voice that says, I don't want to do it now. Just do it wisdom for the ages. Listen, just listen to what, you know, listen to what you know, that's the tee shirt we're going to make for this episode. Listen to what a great idea. Yeah. Speaker 3 00:34:03 Listen to what you know. Um, Stan, you said something just now that I really, and listen, this is not the compliment stand out, but I really feel that your response to that young lady, when she said I'm an artist and you said, I believe you like that is such an exceptional. Speaker 4 00:34:25 So full of love and validation and gentleness. And I just think that this encapsulates why you are memorable to people, I have to say, so Johnny, our quality, the Polish personality intuitive in your own. Right? So stop question. Thank you, Sam. Speaker 3 00:34:58 I want to move on to a couple of rapid fire questions. Speaker 4 00:35:02 Okay. My purpose is to enjoy life and to spread that to others, God is, I love him. I love happiness. Grace to me is presence in my life that I don't have to do any of this alone. Prayer to me is a connection with something greater than myself. Speaker 3 00:35:41 I'm most proud of Speaker 4 00:35:45 Life. Speaker 3 00:35:48 This is what I know for sure. Speaker 4 00:35:51 I never have to do any of this alone. Speaker 3 00:35:54 Powerful. I love it. And love it. As we wrap up, Stan, what do you feel like to say? Speaker 4 00:36:03 I encourage everyone to be present in their lives to trust what they know about themselves, to give themselves the permission to proceed. If there's doubt, bring people in your life that you know, you can trust for their guidance and consideration, chin and love. Um, don't stop. Keep going. You know, uh, identify what you know, to be truthful about yourself and trusting Speaker 3 00:36:44 Words to live by Stan. You are a beautiful man who leaves any room you enter better than it was. So thank you so much. I am just grateful for you to share your light and your experiences with us today. Speaker 4 00:36:59 You're most welcome Johnny Speaker 3 00:37:02 Stan, where can people see your art? Uh, would you like to spell out your website? Speaker 4 00:37:07 Yes. It's Stan piotrowski.com. Speaker 3 00:37:13 How do you spell Petroski Speaker 4 00:37:16 As in Paul? I O T R O S K I Speaker 3 00:37:22 Alright, Dan, thanks so much folks. This is Johnny G with refractive coaching and podcasts. I'm a personal and career coach in Washington, D C I help people, both in-person and remotely who want to make space for a life that feels right. So please reach out to [email protected] or visit my website, refractive coaching.com. I publish new content all the time on social media, usually a little nuggets of wisdom or beauty that I find anything that I think will put more light out into the world. It's a great way to dilute some of the darker stuff that might be on your timelines right now. So find me on Instagram and Twitter at refractive life, L I F E refractive life and on Facebook at refractive coaching. Also, if you've enjoyed the podcast today, please subscribe to this podcast and give it a rating. Every single time you do that, it helps people find the content. Speaker 3 00:38:20 And my goal is to live my best life by helping other people do the same. So I appreciate anything you might do to help me help others. And just a quick update regarding my blog. A few weeks back at the last minute I lost the apartment I was moving into due to mold. I decided instead of stressing out and forcing myself into a new place in six days from scratch, I would just put my stuff in storage news, my ridiculous DC rent money and take a two month road trip across the U S is it some friends visit some families drive through some parts of the country that I've never been through. Of course, keeping in mind, wellbeing and serenity and not in the time of COVID. I am calling this experiment above the storm because I just don't believe I need to suffer through it. Speaker 3 00:39:19 There may have been a time in my life where that was necessary, but just like a pilot I can choose just to fly above it, look down, see what's happening. Um, but enjoy the view. And that's what I'm trying to do. I've never done something like this before. We're going to see how it goes. You can follow along on my blog, go to refractive, coaching.com and click on blog. You can subscribe there. I'll also be using video blog, text and social media to document my adventures over this time. So I do invite you to come and watch what happens when I stop asking why. And I start saying, okay, what feels right? Thanks again to standby. Troskey for coming on refractive so much love and light to you, my friend, and to all of the listeners have a great day. Everybody be good to each other and always remember to aim your.